yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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