I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
