we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Michael Bay diarrhea
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
