can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize