she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
