Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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