Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
