I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
