He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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