still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
