dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Randomize
