I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize
