last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize