I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize