come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Randomize
