No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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