so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
