Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize