is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
