He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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