I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
