She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
