you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize