How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
