fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
