Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
