I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize