She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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