just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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