if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
A bitchslap is in order.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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