You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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