I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
