Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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