I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
