dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Of course I have a pirate flag
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
