I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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