I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize
