his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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