My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize