Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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