After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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