i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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