I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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