Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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