PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
