I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize