why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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