i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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