I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
