even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
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